The Sad Dads:
Rob, Chris, and Jay are three friends living in Maine who, along with their wives, endured stillbirths.
After the devastating loss of their daughter Bella, Jay and Elly were fortunate to have the support of good college friends, including the best man in their wedding, Rob, and his wife. None of them ever imagined they would be reliving the stillbirth nightmare again. Just 11 short months later, they lost their first child, Lila. The two couples struggled with how to navigate the crushing grief they felt as individuals, couples, and friends. Shortly thereafter, another friend from college reached out to see if Jay and Rob would be willing to connect with Chris and Sarah, who were starting to piece life back together after the loss of their first daughter, Isabelle. While the couples supported each other individually and as a group, the men quickly formed a deep bond over beers and tears. And so, from the ashes of stillbirth, the Sad Dads Club was born.
Since then, we have welcomed 5 happy, healthy living kids into the world. We have also met and bonded with other Sad Dads – at t-ball, the beach, the bar, and everywhere in between. It’s the worst club in the world, but the membership is the best. As the New York Times put it, “The men know one another’s stories and provide comfort on the birthdays of the children they lost.” That pretty much sums it up. We’re navigating life after one of the most extraordinarily painful experiences that a parent can endure. Rather than walk a lonely road, we try to help carry each other through the darkest parts of this journey. We’re not experts. We’re just a group of Sad Dads who work every day to bring joy back into our lives while honoring the children we lost.
If you are suffering from the grief of a stillborn child, please know that you’re not alone and that we’re here to help by creating a safe, open, and supportive space.
Thank you for your love, support, and prayers (if you’re into that sort of thing).
Be gentle with yourselves and take care,
Rob, Chris, and Jay